Just watching this movie in Chinese channel about how parents and kids tend to misunderstood a lot of times. The kids feel that their parents don't pay enough attention to them and their parents feel that they have given their kids the best things they can get but their kids just can't be controlled.
I cried my eyes out.. with my sister beside me, also crying, as we watching it. But we do it silently so our mother can't hear it. It kinda took me to my past. Hmm.. my friends who are reading this mostly know about my past relationship with my family. Yea... it all started since Junior high.. by that time, I was no longer the 'smartest kid in the family'. I didn't get the 1st rank like I used to in elementary school, I had a little sister that took all the attention and who always got the greatest treatments from all. That's when I started to look at my friends as my family and ignore my 'home'. I didn't chat with my mom or dad everyday, coz everytime I went home from school, I went straight to the court to play basketball with my friends, spent all evening with them.. sometimes until 7-8 pm so when I went home, I'd just took a bath and then went to sleep. Never spend the weekends in the mall or at the beach with my family like we used to. So I turned to my friends and spent time with them instead.
High school.. getting worse. Not just that I didn't have my 'home' family, I must be separated from my other family (re: friends) and had to deal with this new environment. It was horrible. I spent my first year in that school bullied by my so-called group and my home wasn't get any better, instead it got worse. But I knew, I have to take care of myself. So even though I didn't have any 'purpose in life', I studied and created my one and only motivation. It was to get the hell out of that school! Only one friend of mine that time helped me through all that. She was the one that truly understand my 'family problem'. She was too, "the middle one". Because of her, I tried to go on with whatever things happened in school and at home. Year 11 and 12.. it got better in school but not in home.. I actually couldn't wait for morning to come in weekdays so I could go to school and left home faster.
That's one of the reason I studied overseas. I wanted to go far away from my home. It was just too.. what the word? hurtful, I guess.. They gave all their attention to my other sistas. Both were unlike me at all, outside and inside. I couldn't stand it so I took the chance when one of my close friends in high school asked me to go study with her in Melbourne. I was afraid, but I was willing to take that chance. It was the right choice after all. I had fun, I could study much better, I met great friends, I didn't feel lonely as often as I was in my own hometown. Sure, I still get that punch line "You are not loved by your family, aren't you?" or "I think you're not their real daughter" for few times. Can't say that it didn't hurt me at all and made me think about things, but I tried to ignore it.
Those 3 years give me strength to go back to my family although I was afraid that I might get hurt again, but I still have to go home. Maybe it's because we're getting older and more mature.. it was much better than years ago. I chat with my mom a lot more, I can speak my mind, I told them how they ignored me for years and they understand me now....sometimes.
So maybe now I can put both my families in the same priority position. Hmm.. all this only because of one movie? Well... that is a great movie. You could get a really amazing parenting advices. "If you have a rotten apple, just throw the rotten part.. if you throw it all, you won't have any apple anymore."
*sob*
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