Another story to tell

Nobody knows what it's like to be the bad man.. to be the sad man.. behind blue eyes..

This is the song that I always play whenever I feel like 'cr*p' (forgive the language). The 'middle child' case already began to fade these last few years. Life has been good for me. I've got my partner to accompany me every now and then, I've got my mates to share stories every now and then, I've got to hang out with my mom and lil sis every now and then, I work in the same office as my dad so we meet and talk every now and then as well.

But just yesterday, it all came back again. The sentence of "unwanted" marked on my forehead once again. The reason is simple really, I'm not even at fault. My lil sis went to college just few months ago in another country, a far away one. Unsurprisingly, my parents (esp. my mom) miss her so much thus told her to contact home every week using Skype. But yesterday, when my dad was talking with her, she's somehow nonchalant to the conversation thus made my dad disappointed and hanged up. He then talked to my mom who's then talked to me about this. They said that they're afraid of her turning like my big sis. It's not a super bad thing, but it's a thing that they (and I) are concern of. I laughed it off and said that maybe it's just a coincidence, maybe she's doing something else so she's not focus when talking to my dad. My mom then told me to go talk to my lil sis, as she listen(ed) to me. I said okay. But my mom didn't stop at that, she then said "Yes, all of her daughters are like that. Not polite and rude to parents. He said it's better to think that he doesn't have any kid at all." And I was just like "What? Why am I included in the subject?"
Had I once disobey them? I work in a field that my dad chose for me, I studied the subject that my dad told me to, I worked part time to have my own allowance, I invested when other is spending money to party, I used my own money to buy things, I even dressed based on my dad's preference. Come on!

As far as I know, my dad has been very 'generous' to my siblings. All kind of requests from them will be granted with no exception. Just recently, my lil sis asked to buy a new phone which is Note II. Whilst, she already has iPhone4, Blackberry, HTC Wildfire, a top-notch laptop and an iPad. And my dad bought the Note II for her with no complain what-so-ever. I was the one who's complaining because she also was about to be given a brand new Galaxy Camera which I wanted to have. And when I said, "Why the little one has all these expensive items, what about the older sis?? *speaking from my envy side*" and my dad just laughed and said, "It's her luck."
If she now has a bad attitude, who's fault is that? Gosh...Seriously.

I know how tough it is being a middle child especially of the same gender. It's infuriating. But in my case, it's extra s*ck. 
And being reminded of it after all these years, it still hurt. So yesterday, there was a strong urge to create some troubles, to go clubbing every day, to skip work, to go drinking every single day. But knowing my age now, I know I can do better. Which sort of confused me. Why wasn't I think about doing all those things when I was in high school? When I was in such a rebellious age? Why did I sit quietly?

I think that maybe the savior here are my friends. I somehow managed to be friends with good people which then make me into a good person too. They helped me and shaped me into this person who's strong enough to just shrug off all the negative things happening in my family. So I guess I owe a big thanks to all my friends who've been there for me and help me to got through the rough times, whether they realize it or not. I think in some cases, good friends are better in shaping you as a person than a family is. Don't you think so?